Working Relationships

Relationships require work, hard, hard work. In the same way that we strive to climb the corporate ladder, be that sought after actor, and make a name for ourselves in whatever we decide to pursue – equal effort, energy and devotion is required to make relationships succeed. Alas not too many of us realize let alone acknowledge this fact. And then we wonder why we drifted apart, fell out of love, or why we can’t ‘connect’ anymore. With working couples and especially with couples who live out of suitcases, work seven days a week and are more ‘out’ than ‘in’ the house, having to invest time and energy to remain united is vital. But not all workaholics work because they want to, are passionate about what they do, or are the epitome of striving. Camouflaged behind their work, is their inability to get along with, relate intensely to, or have much in common with their partners. Workaholics work often to escape facing their relationship difficulties and like ostriches, faultily believe that by not facing the problem, the problem will magically disappear! Work becomes the acceptable excuse that helps them evade dealing with intimate concerns. And instead of sorting out issues, they immerse themselves in activity partly to avoid and partly to compensate for an area that they think is a lost cause. If you or your partner aren’t making time (nobody has time, we make time!) for each other, face honestly if the above is true for you. And if it is, develop the belief that it is better to face life problems (however unpleasant they may be!) rather than run away from them. Relating intimately can happen in spite of busy, demanding schedules, provided your ‘definitions’ of intimacy are in the sensible realm and not in the ‘fairytale la la land’ of existence. If you and your partner are clear and in agreement with ideas about what is the good life, what is ‘good times spent together’, and believe that you would prefer to be with no one else other than your partner, intimacy between working couples can flourish.

• Do you overwork and stay out of home for reasons other than work? Why not face the issues and deal with them, rather than believe that your problems will just disappear!
• It is better to face life’s difficulties rather than run away from them.
• Good intimate relations require hard work. Intimacy just doesn’t happen we make it happen. Jointly define what your ideas about intimacy are. And be sensible about it.